A Mr. Merckx writes in complaining that there is far too much photography creeping into his favourite bicycling blog, so today’s post will hopefully stop him eating me. I have succumbed to popular opinion and got a more comfy saddle (ABOVE, LEFT). It has been said that my bike was sex-on-wheels, unfortunately it was anal-sex-with-a-cactus on wheels, so at least it is now it is anal-sex-with-a-cactus + KY-jelly on wheels. My perambulations took me to Manchester’s Velodrome, where I was pleased to find probably the biggest CCTV warning sign I’ve ever seen (ABOVE, RIGHT). This week’s prize to the first reader to identify what’s going on in the T-shirt in the picture. I will have to shave my arms should I ever wish to enter competitive racing.